Leo’s Guide To Astrology
Whether you’re a serial horoscope checker or think the zodiac is a bit naff, Leo’s guide explores everything you never thought you needed to know about astrology.
It’s easy to feel like we’re all insignificant specks in the vastness of the universe, but the relationship between us and our solar system may actually be a lot closer than we think. Astrology studies the patterns of planets and stars and other celestial bodies up there in the sky and determines what coinciding patterns might be occurring down here on Earth, right down to our moods on a particular day. In other words, it’s a big exercise in coincidence and has no scientific basis at all. But hey, that’s not to say that coincidences aren’t real. My star sign is Leo which has the symbol of the Lion and my hair kind of looks like a Lion’s mane. Coincidence? Yeah, probably. Leo is also my name. Aren’t coincidences great? Here are some astrological phenomenon’s that affect us all:
This is when you might turn into a werewolf. Jokes, that’s obviously ridiculous. Whereas astrology is totally legitimate. The legend may come from the theory that people get a little weird when the moon is at its most round. Paramedics and policemen prepare for busy shifts during the full moon, with people appearing prone to accidents and arguments during this time. We even get the words ‘lunacy’ and ‘lunatic’ from ‘lunaticus’ meaning ‘of the moon’. You are likely to be tired, ratty, and delirious during this time, and make stupid decisions for no reason. It’s best to keep any ill-feelings to yourself until the full moon has past. You wouldn’t want to end up in casualty.
A good time to: pull a sickie
A bad time to: dog sit
This is an optical illusion where the planet Mercury’s orbit slows down and it seems like it’s going backwards. Similar to when you’re on a train and pass another train that is moving slower and it appears to be travelling in the opposite direction. All planets go through a retrograde, but Mercury is the planet of communication. It allegedly rules all formal contracts and agreements, personal relationships, and also has a strong hold over technology. This means that when it goes through a retrograde it can cause havoc. Public transport will be more inconsistent than it already is, people from your past will persistently pop up, and messages may end up in the wrong inboxes. While Mercury appears to be going backwards this is a great time for reflection but the worst time to venture into something new such as a job, for example. That said, Mercury goes through retrograde a lot. After going through all that reflection you may end up deciding that you’re not going to let astrology dictate whether you take up a great new job offer or not.
A good time to: do anything that begins with ‘re’ i.e. reflect, revisit, reminisce
A bad time to: text anybody anything you wouldn’t want your gran seeing
The summer solstice is effectively the beginning of summer. It’s the day of the year where each hemisphere receives the most sunlight so will differ depending on whether you’re north or south of the equator. Also known as Midsummer, summer solstice is the day on which Shakespeare’s ‘A Midsummer Night’s Dream’ takes places. If the play is anything to go on, summer solstice is a time where the line between the spiritual and the physical world blurs and everything gets a bit magic, possessing people into thinking that gathering around some old rocks in Wiltshire is a fun way to spend a morning. This is a great time to prioritise your creative goals as the spiritual energy can only help to carry them forward. However, it is important to strike a balance between getting lost in your daydreams and staying down to Earth. The spiritual world is never going to do all your work for you.
A good time to: put a love spell on your crush.
A bad time to : run out of sun cream
This is when the day is the same length as the night. The ‘vernal equinox’ occurs in spring and the ‘autumnal equinox’ occurs in autumn. This is a good time to focus on balance and restoration, probably, as it’s a time associated closely with rebirth. It occurs around the similar time as birthing season for animals like sheep. In fact, Easter and the rebirth of Jesus Christ are celebrated on the first Sunday after the first full moon after the vernal equinox (who knew it was so complicated?). With the idea of rebirth in mind, the vernal equinox is a good time to focus on what is important to you and give up the things in life that are damaging to your wellbeing. That being said, any other day of the year is probably a good day to do that as well.
A good time to: farm
A bad time to: eat lamb
The Age of Aquarius
This is the new astrological age that follows the Age of Pisces, which is what we’ve been in for the past 2,000 years or so. It seems that nobody knows exactly when the Age of Pisces ends and the Age of Aquarius starts, but the general consensus is that it’s due about now-ish. Ever heard of the ‘New Age’ movement from the 70s? The Age of Aquarius is the Age they’re referring to. The idea is we are shifting out of a time of Piscean values, like money and power, into one of Aquarian values, like unity and brotherhood. The world is going to achieve world peace and mankind is going to achieve a higher state of consciousness. It all sounds incredibly epic and exhausting, man. This is probably a time to carry on doing everything you normally do, because the Age of Aquarius will be lasting for thousands of years and is a very long time to alter your behaviour for.
A good time to: wear bell-bottoms and tie-dye
A bad time to: invest in fracking
By following these instructions you’ll definitely be on your way to a stress-free and productive lifestyle. Perhaps. Realistically, astronomical events are occurring every second of the day, and there’s too much going on to work out what’s effecting us and what isn’t. That is not to say that astrology is total rubbish (I’m keeping the faith going strong), but changing our lifestyles to coincide with the changing of the planet’s positions is probably more effort than it’s worth. Just keep doing your own thing and the solar system will work itself out around that.
What’s your star sign? Do you believe in astrology? Tweet us @rifemag
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