Xmas For People That Don’t Celebrate Xmas

Macaulay Culkin as Kevin in Home Alone

edit: Shamil Ahmed

Shamil doesn’t celebrate Christmas. And if you’re reading this, you probably don’t either. Here’s how to avoid being called a Grinch and enjoy the festive period with no tinsel in sight.

Sometimes I find people can make me feel like an alien when I tell them I dig the Christmas season, but I don’t celebrate it. But little do they know, as they secretly call me the Grinch, I am having the best time ever.

Christmas is the most fun time of year if you avoid anything Christmassy and follow my plan below.

1: SLEEP

An adorable baby laughing herself to sleep.

Source: imgur.com

SLEEP. GLORIOUS SLEEP.

While my friends and colleagues are going crazy, shopping, cooking and lovingly pulling each other’s hair out from the stress of gift-giving, my family and I are pretty much hibernating.

That’s right, all those potential hours of being in a duvet sandwich that have been lost from exams, work and the winter season can now be redeemed (and I must tell you it feels good).

I finally get to have some good old meltdown time.

2: SALES

Smosh guy putting everything in a shopping aisle into his trolley

source: thatreallyrustledmyjimmies.tumblr.com

Everything I’ve wanted to spoil myself with this year but I’ve been too poor and broke to purchase because of everything’s stupidly expensive prices, is finally on sale…

…my time has come.

Let’s spoil ourselves with two-for-ones and winter cheer.

3: Food coma

two kids falling asleep whilst eating

source: mikkchi.tumblr.com

Despite not celebrating Christmas, the meals around the time with work, school and home are pretty heavenly. So I like to indulge in the festive foods where I can.

I’m pretty sure roast chicken/turkey, potatoes and gravy are the stuff dreams are made of, and brussel sprouts are definitely the stuff of nightmare. I’m also partial to the festive drinks at the local coffee shop too.

4: WORKING £$£$

Donald Duck walking around counting his dollars

source: all-things-disney-gifs.tumblr.com

If you’re working over the Xmas period, chances are that you’ll be getting a decent pay rate for your time. That means, for a couple extra hours in the day or night, you’ll be making way (and I’m talking WAY) more than you usually do.

It’s a little sacrifice we make when not too much is going on at home. But hey, when payday comes, we’ll be the happiest people you’ll ever see at the start of 2015, no doubt.

5: we WATCH WHATEVER YOU WANT (HOME ALONE MARATHONS OMG)

Kevin, in home alone saying: Merry Christmas, ya filthy animal.

source: kpfun.tumblr.com

source: kpfun.tumblr.com

I still have my xmas TV faves and no one can change that. Which is why not having too many people at home is awesome. I get to choose whatever I want to watch, every year. Muahahaha.

I think I’ve watched the film Home Alone One and Two every year now for twenty-one years straight, and it’s still great.

6: DAYS OFF

Wearing sweatpants everyday.

source: gifs-for-the-masses.tumblr.com

Lets talk homely holidays. It’s winter time, so it’s cold, and TV shows are ace. You’re probably already in really comfy clothes when it’s at home, and your bed/sofa that you’re a little bit too familiar with just won’t let you go.

I don’t feel guilty about any of that, in fact I welcome it.

Pyjamas, gaming, and Netflix boxsets is what I live for this time of year, so I don’t feel bad about missing out on the festivities.

By now, you’re probably thinking that I’m some sort of crazy guy that’s out to ruin Christmas for everyone by being a lazy spoilt sport, well I have news for you…

the writer of this article, as the grinch

Edit by: Shamil Ahmed

…I’m not.

In all honesty, whether you’re celebrating Xmas or not, I, and the Rife team really hope you have an amazing memorable time over the holidays with your friends, family and your laptop/TV.

Make sure you take some time out to reflect on yourself and your year and look positively at it. We’re only a few weeks away from 2015 now, so let’s make sure we start it with a bang, together.

Have a great time, gang.

Sincerely yours,

The Grinch’s brother’s friend’s room mate’s cousin.

Tell us about your festivities @rifemag (on Twitter/Instagram/Tumblr) or at Rife Magazine (on Facebook). Show us some love, join in on the #XmasTreeBattle and show off your prezzies too!

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